tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30033106345490050012024-03-08T05:00:23.119-05:00Three Tassels and a Top HatIt seemed like a good idea at the time . . .Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.comBlogger63125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-30558053456885591882019-02-28T12:35:00.000-05:002019-02-28T12:35:46.835-05:00Book Deal: Back from the Grave EditionWhat's up, Internearthlings?<br />
<br />
Did you think I was dead?<br />
<br />
Did you think I'd forgotten about glitter words like the rest of the world?<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gJxG80PQWiI/XFii4mWb9GI/AAAAAAAAA2w/WzhdGR-02qsGCkmMa2m_2-bcg0C9KDBKQCLcBGAs/s1600/dj5c58a1016292e.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="67" data-original-width="514" height="41" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gJxG80PQWiI/XFii4mWb9GI/AAAAAAAAA2w/WzhdGR-02qsGCkmMa2m_2-bcg0C9KDBKQCLcBGAs/s320/dj5c58a1016292e.gif" width="320" /></a></div>
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I know it has been one hundred years since I posted here. But honestly, is a blog even a real blog if its proprietor doesn't mysteriously vanish for a long time and then reappear all like, "SORRY, GUYS, I'VE BEEN SOOOOOO BUSY RAWRAWRAW" because everybody totally noticed they were gone.</div>
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So, first order of business. We moved the bed. From one side of this small apartment to the other. Not a big deal, right? WRONG. This has caused CAT WAR.</div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YC5w0CdH_X8/XFirkmqwDOI/AAAAAAAAA3I/WEOGqgo2dXEQg2WhLAZ_0zRBLFHOnUhcwCLcBGAs/s1600/catwar.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="350" data-original-width="406" height="275" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YC5w0CdH_X8/XFirkmqwDOI/AAAAAAAAA3I/WEOGqgo2dXEQg2WhLAZ_0zRBLFHOnUhcwCLcBGAs/s320/catwar.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>I took this photo five minutes ago. The offensive is...not going well.</i></div>
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<i> </i>There is pee, like . . . everywhere.<br />
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Second order of business. <a href="http://www.adirule.com/" target="_blank">I have a website</a> where I'm all officially official and well behaved. There's kind of a blog over there. It's mostly just sneak peeks of essays and stuff, which is what it should be. Plus a picture of me with a moose antler.<br />
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And third WOW NEWS is that I've got another book coming out!<br />
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<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XjHEunSmTOU/XHgatlVFvaI/AAAAAAAAA3k/CVjzgd7zhhE697iMpz2Hzhda6i5UKO4jACLcBGAs/s1600/hooray-clipart-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="551" data-original-width="600" height="293" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XjHEunSmTOU/XHgatlVFvaI/AAAAAAAAA3k/CVjzgd7zhhE697iMpz2Hzhda6i5UKO4jACLcBGAs/s320/hooray-clipart-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://worldartsme.com/">worldartsme.com</a></span></div>
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It's my middle grade debut, <i>Hearts of Ice</i>. And there's an arctic fox in it who wears a cape and I know I've been saying that a lot but THERE'S AN ARCTIC FOX IN IT WHO WEARS A CAPE.<br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-d0DiwMjtOks/XHgbFNRMxgI/AAAAAAAAA3s/kH1UyGLk_S8Dn__UsBVdgPByD10kOMrzgCLcBGAs/s1600/HeartsofIce_cvr_NEW.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1102" height="640" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-d0DiwMjtOks/XHgbFNRMxgI/AAAAAAAAA3s/kH1UyGLk_S8Dn__UsBVdgPByD10kOMrzgCLcBGAs/s640/HeartsofIce_cvr_NEW.jpg" width="440" /></a></div>
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His name is Sir Paw-on-Stone. I named him after my Khajiit in Skyrim. Nobody knows this except you guys.<br />
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Anyway. More soon, darling meatbags.</div>
<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-16609124342378729652016-03-15T11:51:00.000-04:002016-03-15T11:51:59.066-04:00Almost Here!<div style="text-align: center;">
Guys, it's almost</div>
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<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/l.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/u.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/n.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/c.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/47/h.gif" /></a></div>
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for my new novel,</div>
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<i>The Hidden Twin.</i></div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EYCaFVI0hQI/VmsGshC1B7I/AAAAAAAAAyA/l4D4_ZLiu7kcuO8mqOfoTcIpVuMe3k6LA/s1600/hidden%2Btwin%2Bsmall.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EYCaFVI0hQI/VmsGshC1B7I/AAAAAAAAAyA/l4D4_ZLiu7kcuO8mqOfoTcIpVuMe3k6LA/s320/hidden%2Btwin%2Bsmall.jpg" width="211" /></a></div>
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Woo hoo!</div>
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<i>Excitement!</i></div>
Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-11048322052981140432015-12-11T12:05:00.002-05:002021-01-16T15:21:36.996-05:00Secrets of the Writer's Life: REVEALED!<span style="color: magenta;">WARNING: As you may know, I just got back from a magical trip to the land of 2004, where I discovered <a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/g.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/l.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/w.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/d.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/49/s.gif" /></a>. Until the novelty wears off, I shall be employing glitter words at my convenience. </span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BG7vQFNnO8s/VTwEpsw7PPI/AAAAAAAAAus/2mbmGTsEEmo/s1600/The-Winged-Horse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BG7vQFNnO8s/VTwEpsw7PPI/AAAAAAAAAus/2mbmGTsEEmo/s1600/The-Winged-Horse.jpg" width="230" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>This is happening.</i></td></tr>
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My first book has been out for a while (it's now in <a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/strange-sweet-song-adi-rule/1115382438?ean=9781250036339" target="_blank">paperback</a>!), my second one is coming out in March, and all those little mysteries surrounding PUBLISHING are starting to sort themselves out like the end of a game of Clue. (It was Me in the Study with six empty cases of Red Bull.)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>HAHAHA!</i><br />
<i>. . . It's all true.</i></td></tr>
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Like a lot of writers, I spent a long time working toward that first release date. And like a lot of writers, I survived it and am now on the other side, wallowing gluttonously in piles of money and attractive sycophants.<br />
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Well, maybe not <i>piles </i>of money. And by "attractive sycophants," maybe I mean something more like, "cats who wouldn't even wait <i>one day </i>to start eating my corpse if I died alone in the apartment."<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2782Jh6fD78/VUTki7h0l8I/AAAAAAAAAvA/PVQvu19VjEs/s1600/IMG_1655.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2782Jh6fD78/VUTki7h0l8I/AAAAAAAAAvA/PVQvu19VjEs/s1600/IMG_1655.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>Psst. Hey. Are you breathing?… I'm just gonna nibble your face a lit--oh, you're awake. OK. I LOVE YOU!</i></td></tr>
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You can head over to EMU's Debuts for my take on <a href="https://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2014/06/02/luciferadi-meeps-goodbye/" target="_blank">how things change</a> for you as a writer once your first book is released. [SPOILER: They don't, much.] But it has come to my attention that there is also a certain amount of<br />
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<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/m.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/y.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/s.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/q.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/u.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/8/e.gif" /></a></div>
surrounding writing as a profession when it comes to non-writers. This post is a PSA for people who want to score brownie points with their writer friends.<br />
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<span style="color: magenta;">So here, in no particular order, are a few</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/w.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/m.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/y.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/h.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/50/s.gif" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: magenta;">and by "writer" I mean "me." But probably some other people, too.</span><br />
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<span style="color: yellow;"><b>Myth: I know how many of my books have sold.</b></span></div>
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Sorry. I have no idea. There are . . . ways . . . of finding out, but I am too stupid to do it. Yes, I get royalty statements. Yes, they have numbers on them. No, there is no box that says, "BOOKS SOLD: 1,000,000. YAY FOR YOU." At the retreat my agency put on last year, there was actually a <i>seminar </i>on how to read your royalty statements. I didn't go. I should have gone.<br />
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<b><span style="color: red;">Don't ask:</span></b> So is it a NYT Bestseller?</div>
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<b style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, ask: </b>What do you enjoy about writing?</div>
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<span style="color: yellow;"><b>Myth: </b><b>I have unlimited free copies.</b></span></div>
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For the most part, if I want a copy of my book, I have to leave the apartment, seek out a bookstore, and buy one. You'll recognize that procedure as remarkably similar to the one I have to implement in order to obtain a copy of <i>literally any book. </i>Yes, we get a certain number of "author copies." That's awesome. But those are for, like, our moms and stuff.<br />
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Sure, I will donate copies to certain fundraisers -- in the same way that I will donate <i>actual money </i>to organizations I support.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://batworld.org/" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-vjIuX724z30/VUToh1WzafI/AAAAAAAAAvM/xHi_2BMTldk/s1600/image-1.jpg" width="308" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>Like <a href="http://batworld.org/" target="_blank">Bat World Sanctuary</a>. YOUR JEALOUSY OF MY BAT SOCKS IS UNATTRACTIVE.</i></td></tr>
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And if I tell you I'm happy to give you a copy, I <i>am </i>happy to give you a copy. But my supply is limited and personal. Kind of like teeth.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dental_braces#/media/File:Braces_cement_placement.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NkcARz2MUfM/VU5JAfRRVZI/AAAAAAAAAwI/whKGudfXOpk/s320/Braces_cement_placement.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>"Dear RECIPIENT, We're raffling HOUSEHOLD ITEMS to support FREEDOM. Please donate a THREE COPIES OF BOOK! Thank you!"</i></td></tr>
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People have been visibly angry and/or betrayed when they find out I don't have swimming pools full of my book at home. My SO has been accused of lying when someone at his work wants a free copy to show their "support."<br />
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Don't get me wrong -- reading someone's book <i>is absolutely</i> a form of support. So yay! But cherished Internearthlings, if you want to support an author or a book<span style="color: magenta;"> in a way that might help there to be more books from her in the future</span>, try one or more of the following:<br />
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<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/b.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/f.gif" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/d.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/g.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/s.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/s.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/n.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/b.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/u.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/s.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/u.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/p.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/p.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/11/t.gif" /></a>
</div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: cyan;">Buy the book.</span></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Pre-ordering is super extra good. Buying close to the release date is super extra good. But just buying the book at all, especially <i>new</i>, puts money directly into the author's pocket and -- maybe even more importantly -- cred into the author's publishing rep. Numbers!</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
No, we can't all buy new books all the time. Often, my book-buyin' money turns into cat-feedin' money or lights-keepin'-on money. But when I do have a few bucks, I try to spend it where it will count the most -- new books by my favorite authors or friends, for instance. Or books I've borrowed from the library that are<i> </i>so good I want to throw some love the author's way.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: cyan;"><b>Borrow the book.</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Libraries matter! In, like, <i>so many ways.</i> Librarians, <a href="http://thetiedyedlibrarian.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">like my friend Erin</a>, are THE BEST. Visit your local library often and revel in the smorgasbord of titles just waiting to vacation at your house. Librarians have their fingers on the pulse (spine?) of the literary world, and they go to bat for books their members love. If your library doesn't carry the book you want, request it.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: cyan;"><b>Tell people.</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and however else people are socialing their media now -- send a ripple into the world about a book you like.<span style="color: magenta;"> It takes two seconds.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Review it online. You don't have to have a blog -- just go to any major retailer or book review site. There are lots of opportunities for readers to throw in their $0.02, and the more buzz a book has, the better. (I mean, if they're universally terrible reviews, then that's not really awesome, but most books get some kind of mix.)</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
And tell <i>actual humans</i> you interact with out in the world.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Q-Z_wo_yeN8/VUUHXbPBITI/AAAAAAAAAvk/jH68Ci3AxI4/s1600/1511904_10153006889223982_8134386190192345095_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Q-Z_wo_yeN8/VUUHXbPBITI/AAAAAAAAAvk/jH68Ci3AxI4/s1600/1511904_10153006889223982_8134386190192345095_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>These are my humans.</i><br />
<i>Wotup 1985.</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
Reviewers and bloggers can get free copies of books, too. Publishers will send ARCs (advance copies that still have mistakes, printed on cheap paper) or real copies to reviewers, and they can be requested, too. They come from the publicist rather than the author.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">Don't ask:</span></b> Can I have a free book?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, say: </span></b>Can I buy you a donut?</div>
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b><b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">There's going to be a movie.</span></b><br />
No. No, there isn't going to be a movie. I mean, yeah, sometimes there's going to be a movie. But . . . no.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">Don't ask:</span></b> When does the movie come out?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, ask:</span></b> Do you even know how clever and attractive you are?</div>
<br />
<b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">Agents take all your money / are unnecessary / eat puppies.</span></b><br />
OK, stop. <a href="http://emliterary.com/about.php" target="_blank">This is my agency</a>. LOOK AT THEM. THEY ARE ADORABLE. They love books and writers. They negotiate your contracts, edit your manuscripts, and go out for coffee with you. There is no way I could have gotten a book deal with a major publisher without my agent, Joan. She is a total rock star who is always in my corner.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">Don't say:</span></b> Something about gatekeepers and rackets and whatever.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, if you are curious, ask: </span></b>Why did you decide to query agents? What is it like working with one? Can I buy you another donut? </div>
<br />
<span style="color: yellow;"><b>Myth: </b><b>I designed the cover.</b></span><br />
I don't get to design my covers. I'm not a book designer, or a graphic designer, or an artist, or a photographer, or a fontista (which is a word I just made up but now I think I actually might be a fontista). Depending on the publisher, the writer might get to have lots of opinions and input about the cover, or hardly any. It's not what we're there for. Oh, and the title is part of the whole marketing/design bit, so that's mostly out of my hands, too.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">Don't ask: </span></b>Did you design the cover?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, ask:</span></b> Is that Jennifer Lawrence?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hidden-Twin-Adi-Rule/dp/1250036321/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1449849627&sr=8-1&keywords=the+hidden+twin" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zNHTVk4IoBQ/VmiYKaY1JmI/AAAAAAAAAxk/GM55R1PQQcc/s320/hidden%2Btwin.jpg" width="211" /></a></div>
<br />
<b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">The editor got to change all my words.</span></b><br />
I encounter this misconception a lot with new writers. It's true that working with an editor is a collaboration, and that every writer/editor relationship is different. So, yeah, some relationships are crappy. But the way it works in theory is that an editor makes suggestions she feels will strengthen the book and you implement them in a way that you're comfortable with -- she doesn't just rewrite all your stuff and send it off to the printer. And if you disagree, you work it out like grown-ups. Your editor should feel like your other half, not a dictator. My editors for <i>SSS </i>and <i>THT </i>are total superheroes.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: red;">Don't say:</span></b> You don't need an editor. You're so classy and adorable.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: #6aa84f;">Instead, say: </span></b>You don't need to take a shower this week. You're so classy and adorable.</div>
<br />
<b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">I know and care how many stars / points out of ten / John Green heads my book has scored on a given website.</span></b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LYTTVVHWh-A/VU5FvuIfkZI/AAAAAAAAAv8/Sk3X6WnigOo/s1600/ulysses.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-LYTTVVHWh-A/VU5FvuIfkZI/AAAAAAAAAv8/Sk3X6WnigOo/s400/ulysses.jpg" width="232" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>A masterpiece!</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Every writer is different, but I personally avoid reading reviews. If a blogger ats me in a tweet, I'll check it out, since those reviews are generally positive. <i>(Side note: Why do some bloggers tweet authors when they hate their book? WHY?)</i> Am I saying I, as a human person with feelings, prefer to only read <i>nice </i>things strangers say about my work instead of awful, terrible things? Yes. Yes, I am. BOMBSHELL, I KNOW. Can my work benefit from criticism? <i>Of course</i>. That's why it's subjected to <i>lots </i>of feedback and criticism along the way -- my critique group, my agent, my editor, etc.<br />
<br />
It's not that I don't appreciate reviewers. I totally appreciate reviewers. Reviewers are awesome (see A Brief Digression About Support above)! It's just that, for the most part, it's better for everyone if they do their thing while I keep on doing mine. If someone says, "Wow, your book has a bunch of love on Amazibong!" sure, that brightens my day. If someone says, "Ha ha, your book was totally trashed by people on Goodgrief! With GIFs!" then, yeah, I'll probably go cry on a mountain in the rain. But at this point, the book is out of my hands, and sprinkling me with either rainbow sparkles or rusty thumbtacks isn't going to change it.<br />
<br />
<b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">The first book I published was the first book I wrote.</span></b><br />
<i>SSS </i>was actually my third completed (meaning several drafts resulting in a submittable work) novel. And it was one project out of a lifetime of false starts, orphan scenes, short stories, poems, essays, and musicals (which were my livelihood for a few years). I find this is often the case.<br />
<br />
<span style="color: yellow;"><b>Myth: </b><b>It's all easier now.</b></span><br />
Writing novels is hard, <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2011/05/novels-are-hard.html" target="_blank">as we have previously established</a>. It's also fun and awesome. But, yeah, it's <i>hard, </i>and every new story comes with its own weird problems.<br />
<br />
<b style="color: yellow;">Myth: </b><b><span style="color: yellow;">I'm not excited about my next book.</span></b><br />
Okay, this is a lie. No one has ever accused me of not being excited about my next book. Because I'm TOTALLY EXCITED ABOUT MY NEXT BOOK. It's coming out March 22, 2016 from <a href="http://us.macmillan.com/smp" target="_blank">St. Martin's Press</a>.<br />
<br /></div>
Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-9589656170008902272015-12-09T16:14:00.000-05:002015-12-11T12:05:55.510-05:00New Book Coming!So, yeah. It's been a weird few months. Death and destruction, fried clams, feral kittens, a squid hat that lights up, writing stuff, playing Dragon Age Inquisition, singing, not singing. Anyway.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/h.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/v.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/n.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/w.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/b.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/k.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/c.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/m.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/n.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/g.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/u.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/2/t.gif" /></a>
<br />
<br />
It's called <i>The Hidden Twin</i>, and if you like books about people who are hidden and also twins, I think you will love it.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hidden-Twin-Adi-Rule/dp/1250036321/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1449695297&sr=8-1&keywords=the+hidden+twin" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zNHTVk4IoBQ/VmiYKaY1JmI/AAAAAAAAAxg/_MCXdTEfUtQ/s400/hidden%2Btwin.jpg" width="263" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Is that Jennifer Lawrence? YOU DON'T KNOW. IT MIGHT BE.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Signing off from my cat-infested hovel. Back soon. Don't ever change, you glorious monsters.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-23894156524519618902015-04-29T20:25:00.001-04:002015-04-29T20:26:35.041-04:00Wait, WHAT?YOU GUYS.<br />
There are some <i>serious shenanigans </i>going on here.<br />
I am sure you ALL REMEMBER the <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2011/05/cowboys-vs-dinosaurs.html" target="_blank">inaugural post here on TT&TH</a>, back in 2011, in which I shared<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/t.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/h.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/s.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/d.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/53/a.gif" /></a>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D5hJQCi7Jxk/TcLVQDBR1iI/AAAAAAAAAAw/FfVDR5HVkU4/s1600/cowboydinosaur.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D5hJQCi7Jxk/TcLVQDBR1iI/AAAAAAAAAAw/FfVDR5HVkU4/s1600/cowboydinosaur.jpg" height="262" width="400" /></a></div>
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Well, now <i>Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs</i> <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/29/cowboys-vs-dinosaurs_n_7172390.html?utm_hp_ref=entertainment&ir=Entertainment" target="_blank">is going to be an actual thing according to whoever</a>.</div>
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<span style="text-align: left;">No, I didn't watch their lameass HD trailer.</span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;">IT WILL NEVER BE AS GOOD AS IT WAS IN MY BRAIN SO STOP TRYING.</span></div>
Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-13941118205333644372015-04-06T12:46:00.005-04:002015-04-06T12:47:36.680-04:00Nothing to See Here. YASH is Over.If you came here hoping to find shiny new bonus content for your favorite YA novels, THINK AGAIN. Like the weak flicker of goodness that once lived in my shriveled, black heart, it is gone.<br />
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<i>However. </i> <a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/i.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/h.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/v.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/l.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/a.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/r.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/n.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/e.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/d.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/blank.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/h.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/o.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.glitx.com/"><img alt="click to generate your own text" border="0" src="http://static.glitx.com/gtg/52/w.gif" /></a><br />
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Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-87266654812245410972015-03-29T13:30:00.000-04:002015-03-29T13:31:19.162-04:00YA Scavenger Hunt Spring 2015 IMMINENTSo there's this thing where all these authors get together and put on a rad scavenger hunt across vast swathes of Web and you can WIN ALL THE BOOKS.<br />
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I'm doing this.<span style="color: orange;"> <b>It's happening April 2-5.</b> </span>You can win my book, which just came out in paperback. But you can also win many other books AND there's bonus content for every book in the hunt, which is like 120 books. You could build a book fort, is what I'm saying.</div>
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I'm at my parents' house and my mother is watching <i>Billy Madison </i>in the other room and she's laughing hysterically. I obviously have some very, very wrong impressions of either <i>Billy Madison </i>or my mother.</div>
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If you want to participate in the <a href="http://yascavengerhunt.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Spring 2015 YA Scavenger Hunt, there's more info here</a>. There are directions and stuff. You have to be able to add numbers. </div>
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BTW, I'm <b><span style="color: orange;">Team Orange</span></b>.</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iegcZsdbruk/VRg2iyTNIVI/AAAAAAAAAtQ/sRs78fJ1Ku0/s1600/teamorange.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iegcZsdbruk/VRg2iyTNIVI/AAAAAAAAAtQ/sRs78fJ1Ku0/s1600/teamorange.jpg" height="320" width="277" /></a></div>
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Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-12261228216450914952014-12-31T23:31:00.000-05:002014-12-31T23:32:19.062-05:002014 Top Ten!So everybody's doing Top Ten Whatevers. Here are ten things.<br />
Also I have the flu and this is Day 18 and I have consumed A LOT of cold medicine and pain medicine and ice cream and pistachios.<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: red;">2</span><span style="color: orange;">0</span><span style="color: yellow;">1</span><span style="color: lime;">4</span> <span style="color: cyan;">T</span><span style="color: blue;">O</span><span style="color: purple;">P</span> <span style="color: magenta;">T</span><span style="color: red;">E</span><span style="color: orange;">N</span></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-size: large;">10</span></b></div>
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This buffalo. You want to get on it now. Too bad. None of us are getting on it.</div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-koXkIqi7FP0/VKTGNeIzDEI/AAAAAAAAArE/n_ZkXip3_0E/s1600/buffalo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-koXkIqi7FP0/VKTGNeIzDEI/AAAAAAAAArE/n_ZkXip3_0E/s1600/buffalo.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: orange; font-size: large;">9</span></b></div>
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This amazeballs diving suit.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-2DJ62WhiNqI/VKTG1yUxWhI/AAAAAAAAArM/A1xftKRX2Hc/s1600/divingsuit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-2DJ62WhiNqI/VKTG1yUxWhI/AAAAAAAAArM/A1xftKRX2Hc/s1600/divingsuit.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">WTF is wrong with me in this picture.<br />It's like I'm dying but also enjoying getting abducted by aliens.</td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: yellow; font-size: large;">8</span></b></div>
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<span style="text-align: start;">That time I thought there were going to be dinosaurs and it was a Park & Ride.</span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--Kd-M1yRuNU/VKTHhJHNJTI/AAAAAAAAArU/zO4KG2hXGIE/s1600/IMG_1415.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--Kd-M1yRuNU/VKTHhJHNJTI/AAAAAAAAArU/zO4KG2hXGIE/s1600/IMG_1415.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-djjZcz75kPc/VKTHhg1jP6I/AAAAAAAAArc/jvq2ErPvj8s/s1600/IMG_1416.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-djjZcz75kPc/VKTHhg1jP6I/AAAAAAAAArc/jvq2ErPvj8s/s1600/IMG_1416.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">LIES.</td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: lime; font-size: large;">7A</span></b></div>
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Two cats in a hamper.</div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-juFbUB7GNg0/VKTJ8Fpo11I/AAAAAAAAArk/LIhDSJvA37k/s1600/hampercats.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-juFbUB7GNg0/VKTJ8Fpo11I/AAAAAAAAArk/LIhDSJvA37k/s1600/hampercats.jpg" height="320" width="226" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: lime; font-size: large;">7B</span></b></div>
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This sexy other cat.</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RIh_IX_Q7UA/VKTFoE4FFEI/AAAAAAAAAq8/J-QEWiD2cUQ/s1600/sexycat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RIh_IX_Q7UA/VKTFoE4FFEI/AAAAAAAAAq8/J-QEWiD2cUQ/s1600/sexycat.jpg" height="245" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: cyan; font-size: large;">6</span></b></div>
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This pumpkin my uncle carved to look like one of the <i>Despicable Me </i>minions.</div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZclsqC9lrVM/VKTKtAj3HpI/AAAAAAAAArs/Oo0zQTSy1iM/s1600/minionpumpkin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZclsqC9lrVM/VKTKtAj3HpI/AAAAAAAAArs/Oo0zQTSy1iM/s1600/minionpumpkin.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">5</span></b></div>
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These hellbeasts.</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-J8zQMQaMG44/VKTLDsqaXnI/AAAAAAAAAr0/1nYI9AgrorU/s1600/hellbeasts.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-J8zQMQaMG44/VKTLDsqaXnI/AAAAAAAAAr0/1nYI9AgrorU/s1600/hellbeasts.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: magenta; font-size: large;">4</span></b></div>
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This hot guy at Pizza Hut.</div>
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<b><span style="color: red; font-size: large;">3</span></b></div>
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TIE between this rubber frog with one eye and this lovely Easter bonnet.</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1n9If0s5-ho/VKTMARvySUI/AAAAAAAAAsQ/at5eWnscRfw/s1600/bonnet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1n9If0s5-ho/VKTMARvySUI/AAAAAAAAAsQ/at5eWnscRfw/s1600/bonnet.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: orange; font-size: large;">2</span></b></div>
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The Dragon Wagon.</div>
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<b><span style="color: yellow; font-size: large;">1</span></b></div>
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This hole that I had to climb into. SPOILER: Spiders.</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-y8cN62VQkwQ/VKTLiPwbD7I/AAAAAAAAAsE/h5NxyoE1adc/s1600/thehole.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-y8cN62VQkwQ/VKTLiPwbD7I/AAAAAAAAAsE/h5NxyoE1adc/s1600/thehole.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: lime;">Happy New Year, Internearthlings!</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="color: lime;">See you on the flip side!</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="color: lime;">Of this year!</span></b></div>
Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-88431817010943615142014-09-02T13:59:00.001-04:002014-09-02T13:59:09.802-04:00WIP Character Blog Hop! Read All About It!Hey, Internearthlings. I've been tagged in a blog hop. It's like being tagged in a game of Freeze Tag except instead of answering seven questions about character, you freeze. Wait, that might be wrong. (OK, maybe just to be safe, after you read this post you should freeze until someone untags you.)<br />
<br />
I was tagged by <a href="http://www.kurtsprings.com/" target="_blank">Kurt D. Springs</a>. His impressive deets are as follows:<br />
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<i>Kurt D. Springs is presently an adjunct professor of anthropology and archaeology in New Hampshire. He holds a PhD. in anthropology from the State University of New York at Buffalo, as well as a Master of Literature in archaeology from the National University of Ireland, Galway, and a Master of Liberal Arts in anthropology and archaeology from the Harvard University Extension School. His main area of interest is megalithic landscapes in prehistoric Ireland.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Kurt writes reviews on <a href="http://www.melissamfrye.com/invincibleloveofreading/contributors/kurt-springs/" target="_blank">Kurt's Frontier</a> for Invincible Love of Reading. He also has an <a href="http://kurtsprings.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">author blog</a>, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Kurt-D.-Springs/e/B00K0117ZG/ref=ntt_athr_dp_pel_1" target="_blank">Amazon Author Page</a>, and is on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/kurt.springs.3" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://plus.google.com/u/0/+KurtSprings808/posts" target="_blank">Google+</a>, <a href="http://twitter.com/kurtsprings1" target="_blank">Twitter</a>, <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7824275.Kurt_D_Springs" target="_blank">Goodreads</a>, and <a href="http://www.linkedin.com/pub/kurt-springs/22/5b3/b84" target="_blank">LinkedIn</a>. </i>Price of Vengeance<i> has its own <a href="http://www.facebook.com/Price.of.Vengeance.1" target="_blank">Facebook page</a> as well.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Professor Springs currently lives in Manchester, New Hampshire.</i><br />
<br />
I did not go to Harvard. But this one time I was in a small chorus singing a gala for mucky-mucks and I was chatting with the woman next to me and she was super nice and funny. It happened that <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2013/10/henry-kissinger-eating-bun.html" target="_blank">Henry Kissinger was there</a> and I asked my new friend if she knew <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5vo7jLGOb8" target="_blank">the Henry Kissinger song</a> (she did not) and I was kind of singing it for her amusement. Then she's like, "So what do you do?" and I'm like, "I'm unemployed. How about you?" and she says, "I'm the Grand Inquisitor* at the Center for International Affairs at Harvard." And my first thought was, "Then how do you <i>not </i>know the Henry Kissinger song?" but then my second thought was, "I am the <i>biggest ass ever</i>."<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*My memory may be failing me here. Or not.</span><br />
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Anyway, thanks to Kurt for tossing me the ball! Here's some new info on my upcoming novel, <i>Redwing.</i><br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YtVIXdW76Zk/Ui5oUAzoDxI/AAAAAAAAAdk/-PKYw2UcwYQ/s1600/redwing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YtVIXdW76Zk/Ui5oUAzoDxI/AAAAAAAAAdk/-PKYw2UcwYQ/s1600/redwing.jpg" height="147" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b style="color: #ea9999;">Please note: </b><span style="color: #ea9999;">I don't have any more images for this post, so I'm just going to stick in random ones from my computer. If you don't say anything, maybe no one will notice.</span><br />
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">What is the name of your character? Is she a fictional or historic person?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
The protag of <i>Redwing </i>is nameless, although the few people who know of her existence call her by what she is,<i> </i>Redwing. I certainly hope she's fictional, and you should too.<br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">When and where is the story set?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
The <b>where</b> is a city of hissing pipes, curving temples, boiling water, and birds of burden, all perched on the side of Mol, the great volcano. The <b>when</b> is just before the Deep Dark, one sunless year out of every thousand.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-GGYYv4GAFeI/VAX9cBM7eOI/AAAAAAAAAn0/VHKZ6NE2p3w/s1600/reggie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-GGYYv4GAFeI/VAX9cBM7eOI/AAAAAAAAAn0/VHKZ6NE2p3w/s1600/reggie.jpg" height="320" width="228" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">What should we know about her?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
It's a bit inconceivable that she exists, and she's certainly not supposed to be alive. Those who believe in redwings know they must be drowned as infants. The problem in real life, as Redwing's father found out, is that they just look so much like real babies.<br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">What is the main conflict? What messes up her life?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
The approaching Deep Dark stirs memories of the previous year of night, when an ugly battle shaped the country for the next thousand years. Old grudges have been simmering, plans whispered in secret places. The unique characteristics of a redwing may, in fact, be necessary to prevent the fiery death of Mol's peaceful city. Or maybe redwings, as many people believe, exist only in mythology.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ahMVseHKyjA/VAYFNhfu2PI/AAAAAAAAAoc/G_OVSF0S8wM/s1600/photo%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ahMVseHKyjA/VAYFNhfu2PI/AAAAAAAAAoc/G_OVSF0S8wM/s1600/photo%2B2.jpg" height="203" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">What is the personal goal of the character?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
Amid her countrymen's conflicting purposes and beliefs, between myth and history, Redwing must discover -- or establish -- her own identity. And, you know, prevent large-scale lava death if at all possible.<br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">Is there a working title for this novel, and can we read more about it?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
The working title is <i>Redwing, </i>and there's a tiny excerpt on <a href="http://www.adirule.com/books" target="_blank">my website</a>.<br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="color: #fff2cc;">When can we expect the book to be published?</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: yellow;"><br /></span></b>
I never expect anything to be published -- I just <i>know </i>I will screw it up somehow, like by accidentally burning down the warehouse -- but the plan right now is for <i>Redwing </i>to come out in 2015 from my phenomenally awesome publisher, <a href="http://us.macmillan.com/smp" target="_blank">St. Martin's Press</a>.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-W-Vzf400ZOA/VAX9psciPnI/AAAAAAAAAn8/CPTO_XLzxw0/s1600/DSC_0280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-W-Vzf400ZOA/VAX9psciPnI/AAAAAAAAAn8/CPTO_XLzxw0/s1600/DSC_0280.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #fff2cc;"><b>Who are you tagging?</b></span><br />
<span style="color: #fff2cc;"><b><br /></b></span>
I'm throwing the ball to the following amazeballs writers:<br />
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<a href="http://twitter.com/stevebram" target="_blank"><b>Stephen Bramucci</b></a>, writer of travel, adventure and food, will be guest-posting at <a href="http://quirkandquill.com/" target="_blank">Quirk & Quill</a>. <i>Ronald Zupan and the Pirates of Borneo! </i>(Bloomsbury) is coming in 2016!<br />
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<a href="http://www.lisadoan.org/" style="font-weight: bold;" target="_blank">Lisa Doan</a>, author of the middle grade adventure series <i>The Berenson Schemes </i>(Darby Creek Publishing) and one of the funniest people I know. <a href="http://www.lisadoan.org/blog.htm" target="_blank">Visit her blog here</a>.<br />
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<a href="http://www.lynmillerlachmann.com/" style="font-weight: bold;" target="_blank">Lyn Miller-Lachmann</a>, author of <i>Rogue </i>(Nancy Paulsen Books/Penguin) and <i>Gringolandia </i>(Northwestern University Press), and LEGO book launcher extraordinaire! (Don't know what a LEGO book launch is? Check out <a href="http://www.lynmillerlachmann.com/a-gallery-of-lego-book-launches/" target="_blank">some of Lyn's work here</a>!) <a href="http://www.lynmillerlachmann.com/category/blog/" target="_blank">Visit her blog here</a>.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ylY6hpE2hpc/VAYCwJL1zsI/AAAAAAAAAoQ/jYohenDQ_iA/s1600/1980274_10201561493546758_600480714_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ylY6hpE2hpc/VAYCwJL1zsI/AAAAAAAAAoQ/jYohenDQ_iA/s1600/1980274_10201561493546758_600480714_o.jpg" height="400" width="347" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Even SSS got the LEGO treatment!</td></tr>
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Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-61702433180715640762014-06-24T14:31:00.000-04:002014-06-24T15:04:07.316-04:00Guest Post! 20 Things I Wouldn't Know About Had I Not Become a Writer<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Cambria; font-size: 12pt; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0cm; margin-right: 0cm; margin-top: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><i>[You guys! Today I'm so excited to bring you a guest post by fabulous writer <a href="http://carolbrendlerbooks.com/" target="_blank">Carol Brendler</a>!! I learned SO MUCH from this list . . .]</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Writers sometimes joke that if the FBI ever seized their computers to examine them for evidence, digging up their browser searches alone would suggest that we have very troubled minds and habits. It's true that our research sometimes leads us into strange territory, and we writers tend to have our own idiosyncrasies as well. Hence, I present to you the following:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b><span style="color: #93c47d; font-size: large;">Things I Wouldn't Know About Had I Not Become a Writer</span></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">1. Pangolins.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">2. The song sparrow's spring song sounds kind of like "Madge, Madge, put on the teakettle-<span class="SpellE">ettle</span>." <a href="http://birds.audubon.org/birds/song-sparrow" target="_blank">Listen here.</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">3. <span class="SpellE">Googly</span> eyes do not stick very well to a butternut squash.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">4. Morse code for S.O.S. is . . . - - - . . . Please make a note of it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">7. Egg creams contain neither eggs nor cream.</span><span lang="EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">8<i>. Kraken</i></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> is pronounced KRAW-kn. Rhymes with <span class="SpellE">walkin</span>'. Can also be pronounced to rhyme with <span class="SpellE">fakin</span>'.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">10. Actress Norma Shearer had a lazy eye.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">11. There was once a menagerie worker in a certain circus who had the unfortunate job of having to manually <i>stimulate</i> the female tigers over and over again whenever they went into heat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">12. Saddle shoes were introduced in the early 1900s as athletic shoes to be used primarily for tennis.</span><span lang="EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">13. Earthworms are edible and chock full of protein. There are recipes.</span><span lang="EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">14. That phenomenon where people think they see the Virgin Mary or Jesus' image in a grilled cheese </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">sandwich or a concrete stain under an overpass is called a</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span><i style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">simulacrum</i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">15. Steam engines are a little scary to drive. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">16. Lest you think dating ads are a recent development, please note this "want ad" I found from <i>The</i> <i>Evening</i><i>Star</i> (Washington, D.C.) of August 2, 1879:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">17. Pink fairy armadillos can be found only in a small region of Argentina. Or more likely, they <i>cannot</i> be found, since the vole-sized creatures will disappear into their holes whenever they feel nervous. Also, they are nocturnal and their tunnels are quite well hidden. Because they are so elusive, their official threat status is </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;">currently listed as "data deficient."</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate; border-spacing: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">18. Willie and Tad Lincoln once put on a circus/minstrel show in the attic of the White House and insisted that any available soldiers, gardeners, and servants attend. Admittance was five cents, and Willie wore one of his mother's satin gowns as a costume (without asking).</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate; border-spacing: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">19. A baby llama is known as a <span class="SpellE"><i>cria</i></span><i>. </i>Another acceptable term would be <i>baby llama.</i></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate; border-spacing: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">20.<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Merkin" target="_blank"> <span class="SpellE">Merkins</span>.</a> (Note, this is PG-13 and NSFW)<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>Good thing I became a writer. Now, you. What sorts of trivia have you uncovered whilst doing research?</b><span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate; border-spacing: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times;"><i><a href="http://carolbrendlerbooks.com/" target="_blank">Carol Brendler</a> is the author of the young adult novel RADIO GIRL (Holiday House) September 5, 2013. Coming summer, 2014: A picture book, NOT VERY SCARY, illustrated by Greg <span class="SpellE">Pizzoli</span>, from FSG. Also by Carol Brendler: WINNIE FINN, WORM FARMER (FSG, 2009) a picture book illustrated by Ard Hoyt.</i></span></span></div>
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</span>Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-90154278628859444002014-05-14T19:12:00.000-04:002014-06-24T14:50:20.865-04:00Blog Tour: The Writing ProcessGreetings, Internearthlings. I just made that word up. It's a combination of "Internet" and "earthlings."<br />
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(THINGS ACCOMPLISHED TODAY: 1)<br />
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So this post is part of The Writing Process Blog Tour, which you know if you read the title. And if you didn't, you can go read it now before you either proceed to the next paragraph or lose interest and wander over to YouTube hoping to find something more glorious than John Houseman hawking Puritan Oil. SPOILER: YOU WON'T. <i>[UPDATE: The YouTube video is gone. <b>What are you afraid of, YouTube? John Houseman and his healthful oil will not be silenced!</b> <a href="http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x38eik_puritan-oil-w-john-houseman_people" target="_blank">I found them here!</a>]</i><br />
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The Writing Process Blog Tour is a Blog Tour in which Writers discuss The Writing Process. You get tagged by a writer and you then tag another writer, and soon we will all know about The Writing Process of every writer on Internearth.<br />
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">I was tagged by: </span></b><br />
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<a href="http://www.aliciapotterbooks.com/2014/05/05/writing-process-blog-tour/" target="_blank">Alicia Potter</a>! Alicia's <a href="http://www.aliciapotterbooks.com/jubilee-one-mans-big-bold-and-very-very-loud-celebration-of-peace/" target="_blank">newest picture book</a>, <i>Jubilee! One Man's Big, Bold, and Very, Very Loud Celebration of Peace, </i>illustrated by Matt Tavares,<i> </i>just came out from Candlewick Press and Publishers Weekly couldn't wait to throw a star at it because it is that fabulous. You can check out <a href="http://www.aliciapotterbooks.com/" target="_blank">Alicia's other books here</a>. And then you should buy them all because her books are amazeballs, and I don't pull out "amazeballs" very often.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-88AIXj0eChc/U3PTfh38nKI/AAAAAAAAAjk/LRcnYipabGg/s1600/amazeballs.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-88AIXj0eChc/U3PTfh38nKI/AAAAAAAAAjk/LRcnYipabGg/s1600/amazeballs.jpg" height="320" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: small;">THINGS ACCOMPLISHED TODAY: 2</span></div>
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There are four questions that are part of The Writing Process Blog Tour. Here they are.<br />
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">What am I currently working on?</span></b><br />
My next novel from <a href="http://us.macmillan.com/SMP.aspx" target="_blank">St. Martin's Press</a>! It's a kinda steampunky, kinda mythological fantasy called <i>Redwing</i> and it contains boiling water, ash, and extra-big ostriches. UPDATE: I have decided that its new title is <i>Extra-Big Ostriches</i>.<br />
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I also have a new cat, so I'm working on smoothing inter-cat relations in the context of a small studio apartment. The transition is taking lots of patience and love, but I'm happy to say all three cats are starting to become snuggle friends. Haha, I'm just kidding. It's Catpocalypse and we're all going to die.<br />
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">How does my work differ from others of its genre?</span></b><br />
Um. Well, I hop genres quite a bit, but in terms of this book that's just come out, which I'll refer to as <i>SSS </i>(pronounced "Sssssssss . . . "), I think I've got a bit of a different take on music in fantasy. I feel like when music has a biggish role in a fantasy/magical realism novel, there's often a literal magic associated with it.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NTOuZn6YzV8/U3P1PRlJ5tI/AAAAAAAAAlE/sGd_EpvKnYE/s1600/Magic_Dyr_Skeletor_by_danbrenus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NTOuZn6YzV8/U3P1PRlJ5tI/AAAAAAAAAlE/sGd_EpvKnYE/s1600/Magic_Dyr_Skeletor_by_danbrenus.jpg" height="281" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><a href="http://danbrenus.deviantart.com/art/Magic-Dyr-Skeletor-112203753" style="font-size: x-small;" target="_blank">art by danbrenus</a><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">Yes, Google images of "music and magic" . . . this exactly.</span></div>
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But in <i>SSS</i>, which takes place at a music conservatory, there isn't any actual magic associated with the music itself. It's all in other places, like the <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2014/03/14/meet-our-magical-wish-granting-space-cats/" target="_blank">homicidal space cat.</a><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-71BhFPGfsiM/U3P2Qkv1YbI/AAAAAAAAAlM/cBOjSghhqno/s1600/laurie-angel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-71BhFPGfsiM/U3P2Qkv1YbI/AAAAAAAAAlM/cBOjSghhqno/s1600/laurie-angel.jpg" height="292" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
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<a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2014/03/14/meet-our-magical-wish-granting-space-cats/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Laurie's cat</span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">My novel totally has one of these.</span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">Why do I write what I write?</span></b><br />
People who read this blog (you should probably mentally put at least two of those words in quotes) might suspect that my novels are full of shenanigans, but they actually have, like, feelings and stuff in them. And sometimes violence and gore. A relative of mine came to a reading last week, which was very nice of her, but didn't buy the book, which is totally fine. In fact, I didn't even notice she didn't buy the book, but she found my boyfriend at work the next day and she and her husband made a point of telling him they didn't buy the book because of "all the violence," and then they were like, "That's what's ruining the young people today and we just won't support that." So I guess I write what I write in order to ruin the young people.<br />
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">How does my individual writing process work?</span></b><br />
I'm very linear. I start with one sentence that turns into one paragraph that (usually) turns into one scene. That's the basis for the rest of the story, and it's usually the first scene. Then I write until I get to the end.<br />
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I have to write each sentence in order, and I revise compulsively as I go. So it has happened that I've stared at my laptop for literally like three hours trying to write one sentence, even though I should have been able to skip that sentence and write stuff after it.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2Eg0Vyu3NlU/U3PmVRAEZ-I/AAAAAAAAAkg/0TNJVVElHmw/s1600/bear_stare.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2Eg0Vyu3NlU/U3PmVRAEZ-I/AAAAAAAAAkg/0TNJVVElHmw/s1600/bear_stare.jpg" height="320" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">This came up in my search for "stare," to illustrate me staring at my laptop for hours.<br />And, you know . . . it's not wrong.</span></td></tr>
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Sometimes it takes me a very long time to get to the end.<br />
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But at that point I have a thing that has a beginning, middle, and end, and that's when I can figure out how everything should fit together. Or<i> if</i> it fits together. It's <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2014/02/05/writing-is-hard/" target="_blank">really sad when it doesn't</a>.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BH8qcnzx-SU/U3Pv0m1tbWI/AAAAAAAAAk8/cU4XMp_49i0/s1600/airplane_cartoon_sad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BH8qcnzx-SU/U3Pv0m1tbWI/AAAAAAAAAk8/cU4XMp_49i0/s1600/airplane_cartoon_sad.jpg" height="139" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">This is me in sad airplane form.</span></td></tr>
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<b><span style="color: magenta;">Who's Next:</span></b> I'm tagging <a href="http://erinemoulton.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">Erin E. Moulton</a>! Her newest novel, <a href="http://www.penguin.com/book/chasing-the-milky-way-by-erin-e-moulton/9780399164491" target="_blank"><i>Chasing the Milky Way</i></a>, comes out in June. Erin is a fellow graduate of the <a href="http://www.vcfa.edu/" target="_blank">Vermont College of Fine Arts</a>, and she likes raspberries and hound dogs, and she has published two other heartfelt novels -- <a href="http://www.erinemoulton.com/Books.html" target="_blank"><i>Flutter </i>and <i>Tracing Stars</i></a> -- and if I tell you one more awesome thing about her you will probably lose your mind. OK, she lives in New Hampshire, the greatest state evah!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-E7k0Nx84Gqs/U3Ptzh_U7BI/AAAAAAAAAk0/8nJRPDLYlDc/s1600/NHautumn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-E7k0Nx84Gqs/U3Ptzh_U7BI/AAAAAAAAAk0/8nJRPDLYlDc/s1600/NHautumn.jpg" height="300" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: small;">It looks like this literally everywhere and all the time here.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">We're not even allowed to have houses because we don't want to mess up our rainbow trees.</span></div>
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-47956314878588732342014-05-14T12:16:00.001-04:002014-10-02T14:50:06.360-04:00YAY Dragons and TALKER 25!Hey, guys, I made some dragons & writers pictures to celebrate the launch of <i>Talker 25 </i>by Joshua McCune. <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2014/04/25/talker-25-inspires-us-to-show-off-our-dragon-bffs/" target="_blank">You can see them here!</a><br />
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Also apparently there's a fractal called a Dragon Curve. YOU GUYS, REMEMBER FRACTALS??<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Boundary_dragon_curve.png" target="_blank">Alexis Monnerot-Dumaine</a></span></td></tr>
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I won the Science Fair with fractals one time.<br />
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OK, here's a real dragon, by <a href="http://silverfox5213.deviantart.com/art/Easter-Dragon-52614542" target="_blank">Silverfox5213</a>:<br />
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IT'S EASTER WHEN I SAY IT'S EASTER, MEATBAGS.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-77599056135448535522014-01-18T17:08:00.000-05:002014-01-18T17:08:07.655-05:00What Could Have BeenToday I searched "Richard Burton" on Amazon TV.<br />
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It suggested "Charles in Charge."<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nEQ7WoDHuv0/Utr68f8OStI/AAAAAAAAAgw/PQ6ycVALk7I/s1600/burtonincharge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nEQ7WoDHuv0/Utr68f8OStI/AAAAAAAAAgw/PQ6ycVALk7I/s1600/burtonincharge.jpg" height="400" width="283" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Your shenanigans make him sad.</td></tr>
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-13782424214355752812013-12-19T13:12:00.000-05:002013-12-19T13:20:09.591-05:00THIS IS NOT A DRILLHoly cats, internet friends, I am now Officially Official on the MacMillan/St. Martin's Press site. No, really, <a href="http://us.macmillan.com/author/adirule" target="_blank">look here</a>.<br />
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Mindset has quickly gone from <i>Woo-hoo! </i>to <i>PANIC! PANIC!</i><br />
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Like, what if people click the Officially Official links to find out what I'm like? And what if they then <i>find out what I'm like?</i><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zzp4N5ceQUI/UrMxSUF5o4I/AAAAAAAAAgQ/3JUnhaKX0Fw/s1600/anus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zzp4N5ceQUI/UrMxSUF5o4I/AAAAAAAAAgQ/3JUnhaKX0Fw/s400/anus.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is literally the only thing I accomplished yesterday.</td></tr>
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OK, OK. Here are some reasons why I am a Grown-Up, Professional person worthy of Note and not a pajama-clad cat whisperer worthy of scorn and contempt.<br />
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<b>Exhibit A:</b><br />
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<a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/12/09/the-12-days-of-a-book-contract-fa-la-la/" target="_blank">This recent holiday post over at EMUs Debuts</a>, in which I discuss FREAKING <i>ULYSSES</i>. That's right. Me and Joyce's great modern novel, wobbling brains in unison. So scholarly.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Vb0BIQjSZvk/UrMzBnt66II/AAAAAAAAAgc/rU72J9Dujc4/s1600/horror.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Vb0BIQjSZvk/UrMzBnt66II/AAAAAAAAAgc/rU72J9Dujc4/s400/horror.jpg" width="303" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You'll note I had to do extensive Wikipedia research in order to know what to put in the yellow box.</td></tr>
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<b>Exhibit B:</b><br />
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I have recently begun participating in blog interviews to promote my upcoming novel. I have answered questions in a measured and professional manner, and not <i>one </i>interview contains the phrase, "Mass Effect 3."<br />
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Come say hi! Because srsly, it makes me feel like rainbows and glitter ponies and marshmallow gumdrop potatoes when people leave comments. Even if the comment is, "You suck." Well, maybe not then. Unless there was, like, a funny picture with it or something. Like a glitter marshmallow pony wearing a t-shirt that says, "You suck." That would be okay, I guess.<br />
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Click below to see my rad interviews:<br />
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<a href="http://www.yareads.com/2014-debut-author-intros-episode-4/book-reviews/11834" target="_blank">YA Reads -- 2014 Debut Author Intros</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.thecompulsivereader.com/2013/12/looking-ahead-adi-rule-and-strange.html" target="_blank">The Compulsive Reader -- Looking Ahead</a><br />
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<a href="http://onefourkidlit.wordpress.com/2013/10/23/adi-rule-strange-sweet-song/" target="_blank">OneFour KidLit -- Adi Rule: STRANGE SWEET SONG</a> <i>(Sh*t, this one totally mentions Mass Effect 3.)</i><br />
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<b>Exhibit C:</b><br />
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<a href="http://www.adirule.com/" target="_blank">I have a website! With pages and information and a contact form and pictures and a book trailer!</a><br />
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<b>Exhibit D:</b><br />
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There is no longer an army of tiny spiders living in my bathroom. There are only a handful of very large spiders.<br />
<b><br /></b>Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-71250623608229814292013-10-08T14:38:00.001-04:002013-12-19T13:14:07.868-05:00Happy Birthday, Arachnid Minions!Oh, friends. I've been wrtigng. I'm not fixing that spelling because that's how it cmae out. Jeebers, maybe I should fix some of this spelling. <i>Who says jeebers?? </i>I've been working on my next novel.<br />
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Also I made this picture.<br />
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There were spiders born in my bathroom today. So . . . yay?Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-45603781490564080732013-10-06T16:15:00.000-04:002013-10-06T16:15:40.009-04:00Henry Kissinger Eating a Bun<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-65887246598311556142013-10-03T19:38:00.000-04:002013-12-19T13:14:30.168-05:00No, I Am Not Drunk. Or A Cyborg, Thank You Very Much.Writing is hard. <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2011/05/novels-are-hard.html" target="_blank">Novels</a> are hard, <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2011/10/queries-are-hard.html" target="_blank">queries</a> are hard, even <a href="http://threetasselsandatophat.blogspot.com/2013/09/titles-are-hard.html" target="_blank">titles</a> are hard. I have whined about all these things and more, and so have a lot of other <strike>whiners</strike> writers.<br />
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So over at the 'Mus, <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/08/18/you-are-awesome/" target="_blank">I posted this special message</a>. A special rainbow glitter cupcake hearts unicorn stickers candy birthday summertime lovey-dovey message.<br />
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I KNOW RIGHT.<br />
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Let's put this in perspective: I took a Social Attitudes test and only got 50% Tenderness (and 97% Radicalism). My Hogwarts House is Slytherin.<br />
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But srsly friends. Writing is HARD. And anyone who does it is AWESOME, is what I'm saying. Is what I said, rather. Over at <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/08/18/you-are-awesome/" target="_blank">Emus Debuts</a>. Where <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/08/18/you-are-awesome/" target="_blank">you can click to</a>. <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/08/18/you-are-awesome/" target="_blank">Clicky click</a>.<br />
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This post doesn't have a picture in it yet. Research shows people would rather see posts that have pictures. Fine, here's the only thing on my phone.<br />
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-16774067986926965962013-09-12T11:34:00.001-04:002013-09-12T11:34:49.890-04:00Titles Are HardWe're rolling right along with my brilliant scheme of putting up lame teaser posts here at the mothership, my true home and the place I should be tending to instead of those Other Places.<br />
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Today's stale offering is a whine I did a while back over at the EMUs about how <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/title-tba/" target="_blank">I can't think of good titles</a>. Like, it's a good thing I didn't have to come up with titles for famous books, is what I'm saying.<br />
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I do invite you to share your favorites and least favorite actual titles, either there or here. </div>
<br />
Are there any books you would not read in public because of their titles? Any you would read <i>only</i> because of their titles? Do tell.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-46591666729539623302013-09-09T20:40:00.000-04:002013-09-11T20:15:11.770-04:00I Can't OutlineIt's true. I can't outline. I can think ahead, sort of. But I never know how my novels are going to end until I get there. Then it's like, "Oh, THAT'S what happens. Man, I need to go fix all that other stuff now."<br />
<br />
I <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/05/19/write-how-you-know/" target="_blank">whined about this over at EMUs Debuts</a> if you're interested. You'll be <strike>indifferent</strike> happy to know I have actually made progress on my current novel since posting that, most importantly by making a mock cover to go on my website until the real cover comes out, which won't be for months at least. So, you know, it's a good thing that got done.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-YtVIXdW76Zk/Ui5oUAzoDxI/AAAAAAAAAdg/k0oUtnkVvF8/s1600/redwing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="182" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-YtVIXdW76Zk/Ui5oUAzoDxI/AAAAAAAAAdg/k0oUtnkVvF8/s400/redwing.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>It's kinda badass, though, right? <br />Like, "There's probably stabbing in this book."<br />SPOILER: There totally is. </i></td></tr>
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Also, my ARCs came today for the novel that's coming out in February. So let me just say WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!<br />
<br />
WOOT TO THE WOOT POWER!<br />
<br />
Here they are in their box:<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nfAeaOXKBO8/Ui5pho_m3UI/AAAAAAAAAds/aVigZD6mT6c/s1600/arcs.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nfAeaOXKBO8/Ui5pho_m3UI/AAAAAAAAAds/aVigZD6mT6c/s400/arcs.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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I'm going to be posting more about STRANGE SWEET SONG on my soon-to-be-in-existence website, and over at EMUs Debuts, but you guys <i>totally got first peek at these</i>. Because I love you, internet friends. In a creepy, non-platonic way.<br />
<br />
<3<br />
<br />
UPDATE: I did the crappiest cover reveal of all time <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/09/11/you-guys-my-book-has-a-cover/" target="_blank">over at EMUs Debuts</a>. So if you want to see the cover that you've already seen, feel free to click on over. Also Tom Hiddleston.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-45078536869186035322013-09-06T07:01:00.001-04:002013-09-06T07:01:38.560-04:00You Are Never SafeSo the contract is signed, the editorial letter has been received, and it's <i>saaamoooooth sailin' </i>from here on out.<br />
<br />
WRONG.<br />
<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XvHjrxMgvlA/UimkQ744HdI/AAAAAAAAAbY/wc9stSANZRI/s1600/IMG_0095.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XvHjrxMgvlA/UimkQ744HdI/AAAAAAAAAbY/wc9stSANZRI/s400/IMG_0095.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
You may recognize the creature with the menacing yellow eyes as a cat. You may also recognize the object upon which she is perched as a bathtub, complete with bath water and foot belonging to me.<br />
<br />
This is my life now, both literally -- as I am actually taking a bath with a cat standing on the edge of the tub -- and figuratively, as my literal situation is also a metaphor for the insecurity of my writing life as a whole.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uhcW7H-7i0k/UimnIy_K0GI/AAAAAAAAAbk/DPMwEC_eFI0/s1600/thumbsup.tiff" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uhcW7H-7i0k/UimnIy_K0GI/AAAAAAAAAbk/DPMwEC_eFI0/s400/thumbsup.tiff" width="336" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/clintjcl/391565090/in/photolist-AASEf-4N6MGq-DDUi5-BHnY8-Chs9g-DgrYp-DDUS9-6bSXoY-AH1Ma-86RtYs-6xjg3v-EoYyV-83Ut7n-bY1jMw-Dgstc-73MeF1-h5TZA-4QxYsv-9uQkGk-asD44B-9uQk1z-6zf4u5-DgtjJ-5Z5Wca-4DdWxz-67k21C-NBYQm-4AfCjC-7Q1d2t-dDsEhJ-xdBrJ-4ofJyG-6pamtQ-4hjf7x-6zjYJN-9o3R6h-8d1EYG-fHX7F-fGYzE3-4MZSDb-aVrts-5KuVoy-aEcced-2vPS3v-dNysZT-5YxFrV-7L8PHo-247hg-4Hwx8z-4uvrTD-5KMj79/" target="_blank">Image</a></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: small;">This is literally the best "thumbs up" picture on the entire Internet.</span></div>
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For those of you unfamiliar with cats and/or bathtubs, Manic Thumbs-Up Guy will provide a helpful tutorial:<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GOTA1wxa4zE/Uim0vNPNQOI/AAAAAAAAAcs/-Sc-J3rIrrc/s1600/kitty.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GOTA1wxa4zE/Uim0vNPNQOI/AAAAAAAAAcs/-Sc-J3rIrrc/s400/kitty.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/qnsagetyrtle/5534722378/in/photolist-9r5U8U-r3euo-mLTt6-64xtbY-6wL3VJ-owNj5-cofN49-8qDQGD-36KazW-aLoNta-4Gam3e-4Gam4V-HaG8W-5YxYcV-d7SLJA-f8y3wy-7VaKA8-4Gam1v-5jPZJT-bspn8S-jcmFq-71H3Dm-djsfJG-7VaFWe-4HfTke-dp2QM5-5wR6j1-dj9qDc-76TAib-5MnTPo-5sdCCR-fwpwMh-71H3HA-5fJEFn-8j3gSP-71H3MC-e7oLDJ-8wi5ki-26JmZ-azNsLX-8wi5hg-8wm5X9-bbt3dR-6XLvKb-7F6JLt-6ukiM3-2Haza-99Cwtb-6vVsbn-aWgwED-aWgvCr/" target="_blank">Image</a></span></td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AGmI60hfRbE/Uimu48yrW_I/AAAAAAAAAcU/9chjOdyDoFg/s1600/tub.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AGmI60hfRbE/Uimu48yrW_I/AAAAAAAAAcU/9chjOdyDoFg/s400/tub.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/vomsorb/4781388665/in/photolist-8hvSgB-ftdWap-fttikh-a7znyP-6DG5y6-4EHrqc-pB4yw-e5FjZ3-bpnQh7-6BMgbz-5nTsBa-e5FjtW-e5zG7z-BwaXa-4mVdjR-a9Wq7F-dDPxSv-9wFdmQ-q9EjN-9BwcaJ-4Sf5AR-6cBycm-84YdX-94Bqd-aCx4su-ahTbC-9csC8M-u6xAF-kmZUK-2sq1Qz-3YKD5w-2sq1Q6-6dzZdM-6iouDA-5XBEj9-5vVPT4-6yBNP-u6zxs-u6zpk-u6ztB-9Djpfs-39XWu-7aYJAA-7wDfBG-8Rk6Lk-LVLaX-7wDqfd-8wipzz-4L435H-5XbGZv-ArXyC/" target="_blank">Image</a></span></td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mroB7yzasNY/Uimuq4tOcKI/AAAAAAAAAcA/nj_4cfL5_mA/s1600/doggy.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mroB7yzasNY/Uimuq4tOcKI/AAAAAAAAAcA/nj_4cfL5_mA/s400/doggy.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/98576553@N00/2964107461/in/photolist-5vVPT4-7JtRZu-58nvXT-58nuAi-58nyhp-58rGCE-58rH6o-58nuQB-58rGkN-58nxhB-58nyyn-58nwMt-58rFL7-58rFaE-58nyNH-65dDiT-8hvSgB-ftdWap-6DG5y6-4EHrqc-pB4yw-e5FjZ3-bpnQh7-e5zG7z-BwaXa-4mVdjR-a9Wq7F-dDPxSv-9wFdmQ-q9EjN-9BwcaJ-4Sf5AR-84YdX-94Bqd-aCx4su-ahTbC-9csC8M-kmZUK-3YKD5w-6iouDA-6yBNP-u6zxs-u6zpk-u6ztB-qyMrg-6UKApf-64on4W-53md1L-9Djpfs-39XWu-7aYJAA" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Image</span></a></td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zpPeoRgmG98/Uim1gAbaa4I/AAAAAAAAAc0/a0CK3xZNFTc/s1600/catintub.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zpPeoRgmG98/Uim1gAbaa4I/AAAAAAAAAc0/a0CK3xZNFTc/s400/catintub.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/33037982@N04/3087265593/in/photolist-5GP3v8-CM2MY-CM2MR-6tft5C-CM2MT-dUo2cV-9mYaQY-6JKhTq-6JKhRy-6JKhPJ-2ZxMhr-foFJ48-62utbY-qzb3B-vix1e-4xjVK9-4xfJpZ-4uaEJs-7Aiytp-4pwiv8-73GUmN-4xjVNQ-69egoL-oecdx-4WKAb-cpfcj-77wrqy-4xjVL3-2M1Ne-6nZdgr-6o4jKQ-6nZ7tx-6FaYy6-4S5Wfp-CM2MV-6nZdWV-6nZaGZ-6o4nX7-6nZ88p-6nZbZV-4S5VEM-6nZbkH-4S5XHn-4xjVJ3-9vsgNZ-7t9QxP-Byyrc-a3W6XZ-7BGLim-5MEWcP-5MKe7A/" target="_blank">Image/</a><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/cdresz/2953377031/" target="_blank">Image</a></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
No one wants a cat in a bathtub. Cat + Bathtub = Instant Bloody Razor Agony Death. But cats don't realize this until the instant they are ripping your face off in a frenzied, homicidal attempt to escape the water <i>they just jumped into</i>.<br />
<br />
Getting a book deal is a little like a nice warm bath, flowery soaps, all the pencil puzzles and/or Miss Marples you could desire . . . and a cat sitting on the edge.<br />
<br />
Because at any moment, for no reason, it could all go horribly, horribly wrong.<br />
<br />
If you would like to read about my editor jumping into the bathtub with me, <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/04/22/my-editor-is-doing-what/" target="_blank">head on over to EMUs Debuts.</a>Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-91289051949994384562013-09-05T10:27:00.000-04:002013-09-06T07:52:50.587-04:00Head on a Pike, or The Upward SpiralOver at the 'Mus, or as the non-hep people say, Emus Debuts, I've whined about <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/03/20/the-upward-spiral/" target="_blank">the guilt that comes with signing a contract</a>.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YFNE5EQFzoI/UiiPckyTNXI/AAAAAAAAAaU/sTJmeMne2q4/s1600/IMG_0060.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-YFNE5EQFzoI/UiiPckyTNXI/AAAAAAAAAaU/sTJmeMne2q4/s400/IMG_0060.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My contract. Hahaha!<br />
No, srsly, that's my actual contract.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
So, you know, feel free to click on over and give it the eyeball. Or if you fear uncharted waters and would prefer to stay here where it's safe, here are some random photos from my phone to entertain you (also, stop going through my garbage):<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-51SVc-GLlzI/UiiS69P-ENI/AAAAAAAAAag/XINLbaXLsak/s1600/photo-14.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="292" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-51SVc-GLlzI/UiiS69P-ENI/AAAAAAAAAag/XINLbaXLsak/s320/photo-14.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A picture of the word "condiments" on a menu that I sent to my friend Lauren who hates condiments.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sc3nlTFQfvE/UiiS_vpi4EI/AAAAAAAAAao/bFEZib3C3jE/s1600/IMG_0050.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="355" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sc3nlTFQfvE/UiiS_vpi4EI/AAAAAAAAAao/bFEZib3C3jE/s400/IMG_0050.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rainbow pegasus unicorn I drew that has recently surfaced at my grandmother's house.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xisJQ0x8DYE/UiiTCrK-zoI/AAAAAAAAAaw/3SFNH8EBYf4/s1600/IMG_0053.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xisJQ0x8DYE/UiiTCrK-zoI/AAAAAAAAAaw/3SFNH8EBYf4/s400/IMG_0053.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A picture sent to me by my parents of warm cookies they were about to enjoy while I was in another state subsisting on cafeteria food.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_IPqn3KdHXc/UiiTNF4uuJI/AAAAAAAAAbE/MP4QDrYOtRQ/s1600/photo-11.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_IPqn3KdHXc/UiiTNF4uuJI/AAAAAAAAAbE/MP4QDrYOtRQ/s400/photo-11.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Chico</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8ECgMDLbENU/UiiTM0WAncI/AAAAAAAAAbA/lM4wRAHzw1I/s1600/photo-12.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8ECgMDLbENU/UiiTM0WAncI/AAAAAAAAAbA/lM4wRAHzw1I/s320/photo-12.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My grandmother's red markered glee that she beat me at Farkle. Surprise!</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ld3hyq7_fUM/UiiTOJ17tNI/AAAAAAAAAbM/fquUdI-5aIM/s1600/photo-13.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ld3hyq7_fUM/UiiTOJ17tNI/AAAAAAAAAbM/fquUdI-5aIM/s400/photo-13.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A squirrel who really wanted my lunch.</td></tr>
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-1136643203819930022013-09-04T11:19:00.003-04:002013-09-04T11:20:24.467-04:00SwoonworthyIn an attempt to make it look like I'm still alive, I'm going to put up a couple linky posts here so interested 'Net friends can check out what I've actually been doing. ANSWER: More of the same, only somewhere else. And SLIGHTLY less asinine.<br />
<br />
Here I talk about trying to achieve <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2013/02/04/the-swoonworthy-debut/" target="_blank">A Swoonworthy Debut</a>. It's not as easy as one would think. You can't just be like, "And then she saw him. And he was really hot. No, like, he was REALLY hot."<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Em_4WJP-0aQ/UidO2FQSSMI/AAAAAAAAAaE/jcuIx31v-PA/s1600/manonfire.tiff" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="261" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Em_4WJP-0aQ/UidO2FQSSMI/AAAAAAAAAaE/jcuIx31v-PA/s400/manonfire.tiff" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/brettkiger/6146983754/in/photolist-anbU7w-8f7VDp-5teET4-KqXug-9ffqjt-7C1Vqs-3QE3Ve-4GgWdk-AhuGY-8gM4h5-4qX6Cd-7rszsB-LU5xA-4vWcTX-dzgRMb-63EAm5-524BT7-6KVsT9-eh3RN-kuGLQ-6yDmES-6yzfec-77xiPN-2mCgGZ-6AyGnC-6MvFge-486bg5-5nmNd7-4PoVYi-4RYiXw-BSS2m-BSTjo-5otjdL-5vKkuH-5nmN5A-5nmNhm-4mjwjd-eWHr3y-9hkhnr-5auNyZ-73gnYq-6oR4PD-kBRAA-aa36BM-uK2c-cmvoEN-eLtxRm-5nhxba-4RsEtL-4RouXg-5Bpmt7/lightbox/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Brett Kiger</span></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="font-size: small;">SUPER hot.</span></i></div>
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So if you're interested, ch-ch-check it out.<br />
<br />
Until next time. Unless I get hit by a bus. Or engulfed by the flames of my swoonworthy protagonist.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-7816887131644003402013-01-01T13:45:00.003-05:002013-12-19T13:14:49.001-05:00Bonus Gibbet Items!I have strayed once again over to EMU's Debuts, so if you are interested in those ramblings, <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2012/12/19/the-gibbet-stays-in-the-picture/" target="_blank">head on over by clicking here!</a><br />
<br />
As a super special extra thank you for visiting me here on the mothership, I'll give you an exclusive eyeball at the photo I refer to in the EMU post with No Googling Necessary!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qzRLnEiEYKk/UOMppQz53KI/AAAAAAAAAX8/SCRcGqwIxhk/s1600/adi_rule.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qzRLnEiEYKk/UOMppQz53KI/AAAAAAAAAX8/SCRcGqwIxhk/s400/adi_rule.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Trying to appear interesting, or trying to appear conscious? You decide.</td></tr>
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As a super extra added megabonus bonus, here's a crappy photo of the awesome publicity poster for <i>The Man Who Laughs:</i><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-w9JTNB_OeNg/UOMuKpmYesI/AAAAAAAAAYM/AKb2Vn9RZrQ/s1600/MWL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-w9JTNB_OeNg/UOMuKpmYesI/AAAAAAAAAYM/AKb2Vn9RZrQ/s640/MWL.jpg" width="448" /></a></div>
<br />
I do not have any pictures of the gibbet, but it's possible I will be able to procure some. Stay tuned!<br />
<br />
UPDATE: GIBBET<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-EuG-rtIdnsw/UOSDTXrEJoI/AAAAAAAAAYc/mFrgk0_kAm4/s1600/03gibbet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-EuG-rtIdnsw/UOSDTXrEJoI/AAAAAAAAAYc/mFrgk0_kAm4/s640/03gibbet.jpg" width="424" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Complete with shoes and emotionally scarred child!</td></tr>
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<br />Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-74236152464733923242012-11-27T12:30:00.000-05:002012-11-27T12:31:16.914-05:00EXCUSE ME, I HAVE SIX JOBSI'm sorry, internet friends. That title is a little hostile. And it's also a lie. I did have six jobs this summer, which was exactly as insane as it sounds, but now I am down to two. The truth is, I am a bit frustrated at how neglected this blog has been lately, because everyone knows that every time a blogger you've never heard of posts a picture of her head pasted onto a bowl of cereal, an angel gets his wings.<br />
<br />
And look at what I was planning! The epic post that never was! I have no idea what any of those promises I made in my last post mean. All I can do is cobble together my idea of what a Paul the Psychic Octopus might look like:<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ClsZ2sq28RA/ULTw-fU7mzI/AAAAAAAAAWs/PBGnegAvbAk/s1600/octopus.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ClsZ2sq28RA/ULTw-fU7mzI/AAAAAAAAAWs/PBGnegAvbAk/s400/octopus.gif" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">SEE? I DID ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING TODAY, MR. WHISKERS. STOP JUDGING.</td></tr>
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The long and short is that I got picked up by an agent, and now I have a two-book deal, which has kind of been running my creative life for a while.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fGJbwkPmVE/ULT1a59sMUI/AAAAAAAAAW8/u66tohviuY0/s1600/Yay-l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fGJbwkPmVE/ULT1a59sMUI/AAAAAAAAAW8/u66tohviuY0/s320/Yay-l.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">http://cdn.cutestpaw.com</span></td></tr>
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Take that cat picture. It's not even my cat. And why is it there? I envisioned it being my little kitty cheerleader, like YAY! BOOK DEAL! But the longer you stare at it the more manic it looks. Now it's kind of freaking me out.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fGJbwkPmVE/ULT1a59sMUI/AAAAAAAAAW8/u66tohviuY0/s1600/Yay-l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fGJbwkPmVE/ULT1a59sMUI/AAAAAAAAAW8/u66tohviuY0/s320/Yay-l.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"I'm so proud of you, I could poke your eyes out with toothpicks and suck on them like lollipops! LOL!"</td></tr>
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Anyway, I'm in the midst of revisions and stuff. Like, literally, manuscript 3.0 is printing and I've got highlighters on deck, just like a Real Writer. HIGHLIGHTERS.<br />
<br />
Will keep you posted.<br />
<br />
THAT WAS A PUN.<br />
<br />
And if you're interested in more of my rantings, head over to <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/" target="_blank">EMU's Debuts</a> and <a href="http://emusdebuts.wordpress.com/2012/11/26/how-i-became-a-real-writer-2/" target="_blank">peruse my debut post</a>. I tried so hard to be more coherent than usual, and somehow still ended up pasting my head onto stuff.Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3003310634549005001.post-5458539588459899712012-05-30T21:21:00.000-04:002012-05-30T21:21:17.091-04:00Coming SoonREAD ALL ABOUT IT!<div>
New post coming soon, guaranteed to include the following:</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
midnight</div>
<div>
symphony orchestra</div>
<div>
name tag</div>
<div>
Paul the Psychic Octopus</div>
<div>
bugs</div>
<div>
Canada</div>
<div>
<br /></div>Luciferadihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17248503525800974502noreply@blogger.com0