Monday, September 26, 2011

Arts & Crafts

Disclaimer: I am in no way qualified to critique anyone else's handicrafts. The last time I attempted to sew a stuffed animal, I ended up hospitalized and had to re-finger a semester's worth of piano music while my post-surgery left hand regained its function. (This was hand sewing, mind you.)

However, I feel compelled to share with you the latest item to come to us from my grandmother, if only to shed light on my potential future disappearance/brutal dismembering. ("She was delightful and had no enemies," the police will say. "Who could have done this? And why did they use such a tiny, tiny knife?")

My grandmother did not create this . . . entity. But I know who did. It came home with us in a box last week with a variety of other arts and crafts from the 1960's.

Crafts were the alternative to watching/starring in internet porn back then.
Which is a more significant sign of the apocalypse?
You decide.
This was how it appeared when I first picked it up. OK, so it's a little lopsided, but at least it appears to be wearing an adorable apron, right?

Then I flipped it over.


Now it lives next to my bed, seemingly staring at the ceiling for hours, days at a time.
Until you pick it up, and realize anew that all along it has been staring into your soul.

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